Curious About Cunnilingus?

light blue cloud with red lips and tounge licking a heart-shaped lollipop in red

Cunnilingus, aka kissing the clam, eating out, dining at the Y… There are so many synonyms for feasting on a vulva! Whatever you like to call it, oral sex is a tasty treat for two.

Many women feel vulnerable when the focus is on their pleasure. We worry that we look “wrong” (nope) or we take “too long” (definitely not). Having too much attention paid to “that” area can feel daunting.

Being fully present and enthusiastically enjoying the delicious pleasures of both tongue and vulva is key for sexy cunnilingus. Having your vulva licked and sucked is a much softer sensation than being rubbed by fingers. Giving oral sex to a vulva should take its sweet time. A moist, agile tongue on your clit can bring on a knee-trembling orgasm, which is def worth both time and effort.

Whether you’re a giver or receiver (or both!), read on for our top tips on how to make the most of a meal at the pussy palace…

Should you remove pubic hair before oral sex?

A customer once asked whether she should shave off her pubic hair before getting intimate with her first beau. There is only one answer to this question: It’s your pubic hair, so you get to decide what you want to do with it. Maybe your partner prefers one over the other, but really, it’s your body and your choice. 

You can sport a full bush, or you can trim to a length that suits you. If you want to remove some or all of the fluff, you can absolutely do that too:

  • Shaving is quick and easy, but regrowth itching is intense.
  • Hair removal cream is easy to use but not recommended for sensitive vulvae.
  • Waxing is painful, but the area stays smooth for several weeks. If you want to go down this route, we recommend booking an appointment rather than doing it yourself. A professional waxer will have the area smooth in a few minutes.

Tip for the giver: It might feel tricky to approach the area if a lush bush isn’t your personal preference. Our tip is to open up the labia lips with your fingers, as this gives easy access to the clitoris and the inner lips. Also, if hair gets stuck in your mouth, just remove it and get back to business. It’s not a big deal. 

green bush

What does a vagina taste like?

We have come across many customers (both givers and receivers) who worry about smell and taste during cunnilingus. A healthy vagina doesn’t smell bad at all, but let’s be honest: Pussy tastes and smells like pussy.

If one or both of you are particularly apprehensive about smell or taste, using a flavoured lubricant can be helpful. Flavoured lubes usually contain glycerine, which can cause sensitive vaginas to feel itchy. For this reason, we don’t recommend using flavoured lube every single time you have sex. It’s more of an occasional treat. If you want to give it a go, pick a flavour that the giver likes to ensure they want as much as possible!

However, we want to emphasise that many folks luuurve the scent and taste of pussy – it’s like the best aphrodisiac! If you’re worried that you might “smell” or “taste bad,” a quick shower should help ease your mind. Don’t go crazy with the soap though – you might be washing away just what your partner is longing to taste… 

Best positions for cunnilingus

The receiver needs to be able to relax and get into the erotic sensations, while the giver needs to be able to hold the position for a while. Considering the agility of both partners, pick a position that suits you both. It can be really useful to have some pillows handy, as you can use them to prop up hips for comfort and better access. 

  • Laying back on the bed is a relaxed position that allows the receiver to spread her legs wide, pull them up to her chest, or rest them on the giver’s shoulders. This position gives the receiver a great view of the action too. 
  • Sitting in a chair or on the edge of a bed is a good position for oral sex. Legs can be spread open or rested over armrests. The giver has full access to the juicy areas. 
  • Standing cunnilingus is sexy, but the receiver will probably need something to lean on. It can be tricky for the giver to reach the clit properly, but if the receiver places one foot on a chair, the vulva opens up. Voila! 
  • If the receiver is on all fours, the giver can tease from behind, or from below. This position can feel especially kinky, as the tongue may just slip over the anus too (if this is something you are both into).
  • Many women feel awkward about sitting on a partner’s face, but it’s a fantastic position. It allows hip movements and the giver will be comfortable on their back. Many of us worry that we’re going to suffocate our boo in this position, but it’s highly unlikely to happen. If anything, those who love eating a peach in this position usually want the receiver to sit down properly! Agree on a safe signal and relax into the pleasure… 
  • If the receiver feels vulnerable with all the attention focused on her, we recommend trying the 69-position. This lets her get her hands and mouth full too!

Tongue techniques

The standard advice on cunnilingus tends to be “write the alphabet on the clit” – but we’re going to steer you away from this. Most women and vulva-owners need the exact same touch over and over to climax, so working your way from A to Z just isn’t going to work.

Also, going in hot and heavy is best avoided. It takes most vulva-owning folks 20-45 minutes to orgasm, so set the pace right from the start. Start slow and gentle, and build up to a steady rhythm. You may need to experiment with positions and tongue techniques to find out what your partner responds best to. You might not have stamina enough to keep licking for that amount of time, and that’s ok. Take a break and tease in other ways, then go back to licking and sucking.

  • Start with gentle pressure and a wet tongue and lips (drooling is good!)
  • Long, soft licks up and down
  • Clockwise circles around vulva and clit
  • Counterclockwise circles
  • Licking side to side
  • Pulsating in one spot
  • Moaning and breathing against the vulva creates vibrating sensations
  • Experiment with different rhythms, pressures and motions
  • If your partner enjoys it, try gentle suction on the clit (this move isn’t for everyone)
  • Don’t go harder or faster unless they ask you to

Tip for the giver: If you need to stick your tongue out, you’re not close enough. Get in there! Oral sex involves not only the tongue but also lips and nose – your whole face should be getting busy!

Tip for the receiver: Let your lover know you’re enjoying what they’re doing. Sighs, moans, and rhythmic moving of the hips are all cues to how good it feels. Gently guide their head with your hands to get them into the right spot. 

Read the (bed)room

The best kind of sex is when both partners are really into it, and body language is super-important during oral sex. If she’s moving her hips towards you, she is having a great time. If she’s moving away, the stimulation is too intense, or she’s not into that particular move. To ensure she’s having the best time possible, ask questions like “Does it feel good like this or do you want it a bit slower?” or “Do you want me to keep going?” in between licks.

It’s essential the giver is having a great time too – trust us, she’ll know if you’re half-assing it. There is nothing less sexy than getting head from someone doing it because they think they “should.” Slurpy, yummy noises are great! Holding her hand while going down on her is great! Dipping your fingers into her vagina (if she’s into it) and sucking the juices off your fingers to show how much you’re enjoying yourself is hot AF.

Eye contact is super-sexy but can feel difficult during such an intimate act. Every so often, try locking eyes and see how it feels for you both – you might find it ramps up the heat!

Using fingers or sex toys for oral sex

If the receiver consents, internal play can be lots of fun during oral sex. Lube up a finger or two, and slide inside. Move your fingers firmly against the G-spot for a double-whammy of sensations, or if you need to take a break from licking and sucking.

two fingers with pink nailvarnish inside a vagina, pressing against the G-spot

A small tongue vibrator can be a fantastic tag-team mate. Simply slip on top of your tongue and treat your lover to moist vibrations! This makes your job easier if you’re getting tired, and it can also make it easier for your partner to climax. A win-win!

If the receiver is into anal play, a cheeky butt plug could be a welcome toy during cunnilingus. With tongue and lips, fingers and a butt plug all working together, all areas are covered!

Then what?

If your lovely is pulling you up to their face or pushing you away, they either need a break, or they want to move on to something else. She may have enjoyed a thunderous orgasm, but even if she hasn’t, there are no rules that say she must. Never put pressure on a partner to orgasm; it’ll only put the kibosh on the sesh. It’s perfectly possible to have a fantastic time without having an orgasm.

Can you have oral sex during your period?

There is no reason you can’t enjoy cunnilingus while on a period if you’re both into it. Women often feel hornier during this time, which can help make it easier to orgasm.  Period products such as sponges or menstrual cups take care of the flow and you can just get down to pleasure. Alternatively, you can easily make a dental dam out of a condom if you feel a bit squeamish about coming into contact with blood or you want to ensure all play is as safe as possible.

Cunnilingus for singles!

We just want to slip in a little tongue-tip for all the singletons who’d love a little bit of licking & flicking of their bean too. There are some fantastic toys that deliver licking sensations, like Wheel of Pleasure and Licking Vibrator.

It’s over to you now babes, limber up that jaw (or charge the licking vibe) and get to it! xx